Cowboys

Smokin Joe · Post by **Smokin Joe** » Fri Mar 03, 2006 8:45 pm

TWO COWBOYS

A young cowboy walks into a seedy cafe in Prescott, AZ. He sits at the counter and notices an old cowboy with his arms folded staring blankly at a full bowl of chili.

After fifteen minutes of just sitting there staring at it, the young cowboy bravely asks the old cowpoke, "If you ain't gonna eat that, mind if I do?"

The older cowboy slowly turns his head toward the young wrangler and in his best cowboy manner says, "Nah, go ahead."

Eagerly, the young cowboy reaches over and slides the bowl over to his place and starts spooning it in with delight.
He gets nearly down to the bottom and notices a dead mouse in the chili.

The sight was shocking and he immediately pukes up the chili into the bowl.

The old cowboy quietly says, "Yep, that's as far as I got, too."

buffalocannon · Post by **buffalocannon** » Sat Mar 04, 2006 7:36 am

Oh, I thought you were going to tell us the one about the two homosexual cowboys herding sheep up in Wyoming.

Bad Ass Wallace · Post by **Bad Ass Wallace** » Sun Mar 05, 2006 4:06 am

[quote="buffalocannon"]Oh, I thought you were going to tell us the one about the two homosexual cowboys herding sheep up in Wyoming.[/quote]
Yeah, the movie is to be called "Lonesome Doug"

Leatherstocking · Post by **Leatherstocking** » Mon Mar 06, 2006 3:55 pm

In Wyoming the words "sheep", "cowboy" and "Homosexual" usually don't appear in single sentences........unless it would be "the cowboy beat the homosexual with the sheep that happened to get lost from the rest of the flock and wondered into the cow herd, which the unfortunate homosexual also accidently walked into, looking for someone to give him (the homosexual) directions to California"! Unless you're talking about Teton County Wyoming in which many of the previous roles might be switched!

Old Doe Shooter · Post by **Old Doe Shooter** » Tue Mar 07, 2006 4:18 pm

wouldn't they be sheepboys not cowboys ? maybe that explains it?

Leatherstocking · Post by **Leatherstocking** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 1:14 pm

Actually the word "cowboy" is a 1,000 year old Celtic term, meaning "stock handler." Until about the 1880's it was a pejorative term meaning "outlaw" ie. "Arizona Cowboys" see "Tombstone"

or cattle rustler or scoundrel. Texas cowboys were usually known as "vaqueros" or the more acceptable anglo term "drovers". Cowboy is today a very generic word, unless of course you're a cowboy. In England it is a negative term for piss poor plumbers......or carpenters or ones who "milk" a building project!

I have to say, judging from the 100 year old aspen tree graffiti I've seen in the southern Rockies, the sheep herders in that country seemed to be more obsessed with heterosexual sex as opposed to sex with sheep or each other........................it's amazing the artistic talent some of those guys had!.....also the pure boredom that came from tending sheep! King David learned patience from sheep and obviously a reason why the Bible uses the simile!

Leatherstocking

buffalocannon · Post by **buffalocannon** » Sat Mar 11, 2006 10:06 am

In the criminal justice system, judges and some others sometimes refer to "bad cops" or overly aggressive police officers as "cowboys."

RMulhern · Post by **RMulhern** » Sun Mar 12, 2006 9:14 pm

[quote="Leatherstocking"]In Wyoming the words "sheep", "cowboy" and "Homosexual" usually don't appear in single sentences........unless it would be "the cowboy beat the homosexual with the sheep that happened to get lost from the rest of the flock and wondered into the cow herd, which the unfortunate homosexual also accidently walked into, looking for someone to give him (the homosexual) directions to California"! Unless you're talking about Teton County Wyoming in which many of the previous roles might be switched![/quote]

leatherstocking

Hehe! Got a friend what is a really good guy; one of them ear, nose and throat Docs he is and if there's anything that he likes better than shooting rifles, hunting elk, and looking at pretty womens....I don't know bout it! Well....several years ago....he booked him a elk hunt with an ole boy up in Wyoming and in talking to his client....the good Doc....whom was a flyin in to wherever....he told the Doc...."Whatever you do.....don't go in the Cowboy Bar! Just stand out on the street with ya duffle bag and I'll find ya!" Well....the Hunter goes into town; can't find the Doc so...yep....in the Cowboy Bar he's a headin when out walks the good Doc. The Hunter looks the Doc over....eyes real big...looks him over again and tells the Doc...."I thought I told ya ta not go in there Doc!" Well...the Good Doc being a good ole boy says "Hell man...I wanted me a whiskey so there wasn't any other place! Why ya didn't want me a goin in the bar anyway?" The Hunter tells him....."Well...fer ya protection...that's why! Last week I had a guy in here from New Jersey and I found him out here a layin in the gutter wif his nose and lip all busted and two ribs a broken...that's why! And when I asked him what happened he told me...."Well...the bar keep asks me....what I wanted and I told him a chocolate malt and the next thing I knowed.....someone spun me round on thet stool I's a sittin on....jerked my turtle neck sweater up over my head....and that's all I remember......till you woke me up!"

The good Doc told me when he walked in the bar....."Man....I ain't never seen so many tall and big men in one spot in all my life and all of 'em a wearin cowboy hats!" Don't know it for certain but the good Doc could have more 'n likely held his own....as he taught that Karate crap every week, held all them belts ya kin win in that game.....and personally....when he was 48 years old I saw him kick the door faceing over my office door one day....to win a six pack o beer!!